judging you, judging me...

In my short lifetime i have realized a lot of things. one is, people love to judge. and we especially love judging misdeeds of others. i keep on trying to figure out why... so i decided to make myself the lab-rat for my little experiment. i had these questions to answer:

• what makes me judge someone?
• how do i judge them?
• what happens after i judge that person?
• what good have i got out of it?

Firstly, i judge people because i am either intrigue or envious. intrigue because there is something i wanna know about that person and there is no way of knowing it or i am just too proud or "indifferent" to ask. so i start to make my own judgments about him and come up with my own answers. in short, a way of satisfying my curiosity. now, envious because they have something i do not have or want so badly but unable to get. so i judge them, mostly badly, to justify the "fact" that one cannot get everything but rather one gets what they deserve. so i start thinking of "yes, they have it, but they cannot have that because they have done these..." get the picture? well, i hope you do so we can be of better understanding with each other :D

then, how do i judge them... hmmm... i would usually dissect their lives, cast away most of the good parts(i found out that it feels good to know that you are somehow better than someone even if you know that it's just you making the judgment) and use the bad parts to procure the judgment i needed. that mostly is it. nothing much to it. :D

what happens next is quite peculiar coz i found out that whatever "good" i felt was short-lived. it's like that bag of chips that you'd think you would be satisfied after eating but you just end up wanting more coz you can't get enough of it. or there isn't enough to satisfy me... ever. and then, i would feel bad. because i would realize that what i did was unfair and even if i kept my judgments to myself, it's still bad enough to make false assumptions about someone.

in the end i realized, there isn't anything good about judging other people by how bad they look, how bad they behave around others, how poor their hygiene is or how bad they sound when they talk and so on and so forth. because each and everyone of us have our own little bad things, so in judging others, we judge ourselves. in conclusion, the only good thing i got from all these is knowing that i was doing a bad thing and that i should be changing. how appropriate! it's a new year... time for a new beginning. and also, it's better to really know a person first before you make any assumptions. and if i don't get the chance to know that person, i should let him be. to each his own. :)

from now own i'll leave the judging to the judges... but i will not say never. :D